Somebody SAVE me!

“The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure.” ~ Sven Goran Eriksson

The fear of failure is a sub-conscious courage eater. It will rob you of passion, paralyze your mind, and urge you to give the responsibility for success to someone, or something else.

Have you ever felt that thing in the back of your conscious mind that wants you to run away, the moment you see the possibility that you could fail? We all have it. I think it’s purpose is to keep us safe, which would be fine, if we still lived at our parent’s houses with everything we need supplied by someone else in a perfectly safe world that was free from disease, pain, and suffering of any kind.

Since that is not the world we live in, and since our world is not SAFE. We have to come to grips with the reality that there is no avenue of retreat, we must arm ourselves. We must prepare mentally to live in the absence of safety, to live in a dangerous world with the possibility of failure forever lurking at the back of our subconscious mind, telling us to retreat.

What happens when the fear of failure is nagging you, and your subconscious is telling you to retreat? Our first instinct is often to scream “Save me” to anyone willing to listen.

• Business owners yell “save me” to marketing firms and coaches
• Mom’s yell “save me” to school programs and babysitters
• Personal finances yell “save me” to financial planners or bankruptcy attorneys
• People in need yell “save me” to anyone willing to listen
• Sometimes big businesses yell “save me” to government
• Sometimes government yells “save me” to taxes

Don’t get me wrong I am all for asking for help, collaboration, gaining partners, and teams. The difference between asking for help and yelling “save me” is this; asking for help implies that I am emotionally and mentally keeping the responsibility for my success and I simply want to team up, or ask for your help as a part of the effort to succeed.

Whereas; Yelling “save me” implies that I am giving you the responsibility for MY SUCCESS. And this will allow the fear of failure to destroy you. We can never give the responsibility for our own success to anyone. We can delegate, we can collaborate, we can orchestrate, and we can simply get help. But, if we give the responsibility for success to someone else, we have lost the war. We have retreated, and we have lost all influence in our success, guaranteeing failure.

So next time you feel that fear of failure begin to creep up on you, stop and make a plan. Stop and think about how to attack. Become even that much more committed to owning the responsibility you have to your own success.

And only then, ask for help and collaborate towards your success with marketing firms, coaches, attorneys, school programs, friends, government, and anyone who can help.

Don’t be a victim to the fear of failure, be an OWNER of your own success.

Owning it daily,

Jon Bohm

Inspiration/Values, Knowledge, Leadership, Motivation

“There are 2 primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist or to accept the responsibility for changing them.”- DENIS WAITLEY

Did Tiger mess up? Yes. I think we would all agree, especially his wife, “yeah, he messed up.”

But, that is not really the question we have to wrestle with the question we have to wrestle with is “Now what?” What do we do as sponsors, what do we do as the public with an icon, forerunner, and elite hero like Tiger when they mess up?

We know better than to crucify someone for messing up, we know we don’t ever want to be the one to be casting any stones, because we know that we all mess up to one degree or another. We know that forgiveness is stronger than bitterness and we know that to love someone’s strengths and despise them for their mistakes isn’t love at all. And we love our heroes, don’t we?

So, how do we handle this? How does Tiger handle it? How do we avoid it? And how should we think about it?

As for “how does Tiger handle it?” The experts and press have beat this one to death. We all know, he needs to step out front and own the fact that he is a hero and continue to act like a hero by taking responsibility for it. But, that isn’t our call, is it? This whole things is actually none of my business. All we can really think about is how are we going to deal with it? How should the sponsors deal with it?

I have found, I deal with it in a very simple way. I hope and pray he finds the right help to get healthy and live a great life with or without golf. I hope he finds the people and the tools to reach deep and get healthy emotionally so he can enjoy this one chance at life we all get. And money isn’t the answer, we all know that. Happiness come from within, and clearly Tiger needs to reach within.

So, that leaves really only one question left to deal with. What do the sponsors do? What do you do? To support or not support those products? or Tiger in front of the kiddos?

As for me, as a consumer, I don’t buy products because of who sponsors them. So, I won’t NOT buy them based on who sponsors them either.

As for the sponsors, what a tough decision! They have one of the greatest athletes to ever live partnering with them to promote their livelihood. Incredible. But, I don’t see how they can still use him as a sponsor, it’s down right ironic how difficult it will be given the nature of Tiger’s bad decisions. Woods’ sponsors include Gillette, Gatorade, Accenture, Nike and AT&T. So here is why I don’t think they can keep him. Wood’s apparently had multiple sexual affairs with a wide range of women over a large portion of the country or maybe event the world and listen to the tag lines of each of his sponsors:

Inspiration/Values, Knowledge, Leadership

Every group contains 2 types of people, “givers” and “takers.”

Givers are always focused on what they can give to help others, to make the world a better place, to grow their business, to have bigger impact, and to add value.

Takers are always focused on what they can take to help themselves, to make their little (I emphasize little) world a better place, to grow their business, and add value to themselves. The irony is that by doing so, they lose value, shrink their business, and lose influence in the world.

Networking can be hell or it can be heaven. It just depends on who you are networking with… “givers” or “takers.”

Take this little allegory as an example:

A man spoke with the Lord
about heaven and hell.

The Lord said to the man,
“Come, I will show you hell.”

They entered a room where a group of
people sat around a huge pot of stew.

Everyone was famished,
desperate and starving.

Each held a spoon that reached the pot,
but each spoon had a handle so much
longer than their own arm that it could not
be used to get the stew into their own mouths.

The suffering was terrible.

“Come, now I will show you heaven,”
the Lord said after a while.

They entered another room, identical to the first -
the pot of stew, the group of people, the same long-handled spoons.
But there everyone was happy and well-nourished.

“I don’t understand,” said the man.
“Why are they happy here when they were miserable
in the other room and everything was the same?”

The Lord smiled.
“Ah, it is simple,” he said. “Here they have learned to feed each other.”- Heaven and Hell, The Real Difference by Ann Landers

If you want to be a great networker, grow your business or life, make more money, reach your dreams, and have a bigger impact than you have to learn to be a giver and network with other givers. Which one are you?

An honest test: 1. Make a list of everything someone or something has done for you. 2. Now, make a list of what you have done for others.

How can you add more value to the world and your clients? Answer that everyday and watch your success explode.

Be a giver!

Jon Bohm

Inspiration/Values, Knowledge, Sales

Anger is a secondary emotion. You have to kill the root.

On a regular basis I have a client or a friend, kids, or myself that have a day you could put in the funk category. A day when you are not firing on all cylinders so to speak.

Have you ever had a day like that? We all do?  The occasional emotional setback. No big deal, right?

Depends, I guess on the day. If you spend your day in a funk instead of landing that new client it could have long term effects. I tell every client I have, if you are going to be an entrepreneur you have to embrace the fact that you don’t get the luxury of a crappy attitude, self pitty, or even a funk for very long if at all.

So, how do we avoid the funk? How do we keep the funky day from becoming a funky week, month, year, or your life? I can’t cover it all in a little blog post but I will give you this. In almost every situation when you find yourself in a funk it’s because 1 of 4 things; you allowed yourself to become too:

H.ungry
A.ngry
L.onely or
T.ired

Next time you feel yourself slipping into the funk, stop (halt) and ask yourself; “Am I too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired?” The answer is yes 98 % of the time. So, stop and fix it, or take regular daily checks to keep the funk at bay.

It turns out my Mom new how to keep the funky days at bay with sleep, the right diet, good friends, and emotional health. And that alone can be a great New Year’s resolution.

Happy New Year and Cheers to the good life.

Live a great story in 2010!

Jon Bohm

Goals, Inspiration/Values, Knowledge, Motivation

Are You Living a Story worth telling?

Goals, Inspiration/Values, Motivation

“There is just something about the way we are as humans, we will never find deep satisfaction focused on ourselves, it’s not until we plant the flag of focus outside ourselves that we can find true fulfillment.” Me

Inspiration/Values

Living your entire life always doing what you SHOULD can give you a safe predictable life that leaves you completely disappointed in the end because you never answered the honest and simple question of “What do I WANT?”- Jon Bohm

What do YOU want?

I mean really what do you want, not what you SHOULD want, but what do you really WANT?

Sometimes those things are the same. I should go to work today and I WANT to go to work today. Great! That is an important distinction. When you live your life the way you should instead of the way you want your heart, emotions, desires, and mind are sitting on the sideline as you live your dutiful existence moving through the motions without passion.

What are you doing in your life that you SHOULD be doing?

What are you NOT doing that you SHOULD be doing?

I should go to church. I did go to church because I SHOULD.

I should go home and hang with my family. I did go home and hang with the family because I SHOULD.

I should make that sales call. I made the call because I SHOULD.

I SHOULD take my spouse out. ETC. ETC.

What is it that you do without emotional passion and desire because you SHOULD?

Now, don’t take me wrong I’m not saying we all need to ignore whatever we SHOULD be doing.  Instead of ignoring, we have to make the mental and attitudinal shift to quit saying I SHOULD and change it to I WANT to do this.

Most of the time it’s as simple as catching your self in the middle of a SHOULD and simply replacing the word SHOULD with WANT.  It’s time to get YOUR passions and emotions off the bench and into the game of life.

The bottom line is you have an incredible life to live.  Start living it because you WANT to and stop living it because you SHOULD.  It’s time for YOU to get emotional involved in YOUR life.  If you need help making the switch, please contact me anytime!

May we hit the ground living the life we WANT to live today!

Enjoy Life!

Jon Bohm

Goals, Inspiration/Values, Leadership, Motivation

“Everyone needs someone to help them take action on the simple things in life, because simple is not EASY.”- Jon Bohm

In high school I wore a baseball cap that had the name brand “SIMPLE” on the front.  SIMPLE is a great clothing and shoe manufacturer.  I had a boss that would always make fun of me for wearing that hat.  His jokes always themed around the idea that to be simple is to be slow… and basically a moron.

As you can imagine, I’m over it now- ok I still have a little resentment :).  As a matter of fact, I couldn’t disagree with that assumption (that “simple” means you can’t even tie your own shoes) more!  The mark of a brilliant person is to be able to take complicated ideas and make them simple enough to be useful and practical.

The greatest things in life are simple:

• Love
• Friendship
• Compassion
• Making Money
• Saving Money
• Starting a new healthy habit in the New Year
• Quitting an old unhealthy habit
• Staying active
• Eating Healthy
• Improving your quality of life
• Raising truly great kids
• Developing greatness in others
• Making the world, or at least your world, a better place

Maybe, as you were reading that list you started to disagree with me?  What do you think?  Simple?  Is it simple to love your spouse?  Is it simple to raise great kids?  Is it simple to make money?  To eat healthy, make the world a better place….etc?

Of course.  It is SIMPLE.  However, it is NOT EASY.  Somewhere a long the line I believe just about everything in our culture has confused simple with easy.  For example,  if you want to stop smoking it’s not complicated.  All  you have to do is not put another cigarette in your mouth, don’t light it, and don’t puff on it.  This is not rocket science.  If you want to eat healthy all you have to do is put healthy food into your mouth, chew, and swallow.  Again not rocket science.  But NOT easy either.

So, let me ask you.  If you could change anything in your life and improve on some things, what would you change?

Take a moment….ok got it?

Now, let’s be real honest, is it a simple change?

I would be willing to bet all 3 of those things could realistically change in the next 12 months.  Could they?  If so, than why haven’t you changed them already?  What is getting in your way?  What simple thing has become complicated or difficult and why?

Let me ask another question?  Are you becoming more and more, everyday, the person YOU WANT to be in the future?  Are you pulling your future into your present?  If you are stuck in a rut,  or if you know what simple things you need to change, than change them and don’t make it complicated.  Or, reach out for help.  I help people every single day accomplish SIMPLE but not EASY things that they never thought were possible!

If you need help, reach out…. to family, to friends, to a professional like myself, or all the above and get your life moving.  Just because it’s simple doesn’t mean it’s easy, and it doesn’t give you an excuse to just keep saying that “someday I will be different, quit smoking, start a business, love my spouse better, make more money, etc.”

Enjoy your life and make changes NOW, because “Someday” never comes without changing things NOW.

Jon Bohm

Goals, Inspiration/Values, Motivation

• Are they a good fit for you? Do you like them and trust them?
• Are they results focused? A lot of people will charge you good money to listen to you. But, will they help you actually achieve the results you need in your life and business? Knowledge is NOT power- APPLIED Knowledge is power.
• Do they have legitimate names and numbers of people you could call to see if they are truly good at what they do?
• Are they focused on long termdevelopment of you and your life, or is it short-term training that you will have to try and remember?
• Do they help you get past the obstacles in your life and business or are they just focused on your goals?
• Do they help you in life and business? Or do they just focus on one or the other?

A couple pitfalls that are easy to fall into are:

Often people want to make sure the coach they are looking at has extensive knowledge in their industry, but a good coach can help you develop your skills and attitude in a field they may not even know much about. If you need training look for a good consultant or mentor. Although, some coaches do very well in both roles.

Often people will look for a coach with the most degrees. But, degrees do little in determining whether someone is good atmotivating, inspiring, developing, and applying the attitudes and action of others.

Sometimes people think they have it all figured out and don’t need help. We all need help, every good coach will hire coaches themselves and they are always focused on life long learning.

Tiger Woods has three coaches and he is the best in the world. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking you have arrived.

Cheers to always moving forward with some collaborative help!

-Jon Bohm

Inspiration/Values, Knowledge, Leadership

Goals, Inspiration/Values, Leadership, Motivation